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Here we go...bring on the Stanley Cup Finals! And what the heck...bring on the Hockey Horoscopes, too. Jan Snyder breaks down the Wings/ Penguins series, Leo’s Aries and all.

Of Octopi and Penguins

 

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Game One

 
 
by Jan Snyder
Saturday May 24th, 2008

Well, here we are…..the Stanley Cup Finals…..just the Redwings and the Penguins….and of course, all of us.  Can you believe it? 

This excitement has been building since way back in the first round.  First the Pens handled the Sens; then they dispatched the Rangers; up came the Flyers and down went the Flyers.  Now the Red Wings are the only team standing in the way of bringing the Stanley Cup back to Pittsburgh after 17 long years.

Need another banner?


What can I say about the teams?  The two best teams in each conference came through to have the privilege of vying for the Championship.  Two mirror image teams – one young and hungry, the other experienced and hungry.  The forwards are so talented – Crosby and Malkin, Datsuyk and Zetterberg.  The defensemen are stellar featuring two of the best, Gonchar and Lidstrom.  The goalies are excellent – the playoff inexperienced Fleury against the battle-tested Osgood.  What a series we are in for the next couple of weeks!  Eight donuts down, only four to go.


There is no new or uncovered angle to talk about so I wondered how to add a different take to the games.  Here’s what I came up with: astrology and horoscopes.  Come on, admit it – you read them, you apply them, you believe them, especially when they’re good!  So let’s look a little closer at our players, shall we?


Sidney Crosby and Evgeni Malkin are both Leos (August 7 and July 31 respectively).  Leos are confident, ambitious, loyal and encouraging.  (I should know, I’m a Leo too.)  They love drama and excitement (like the Stanley Cup Finals) and always want to be the “center” (pun intended) of attention.  Leos are all about pride and they work best in a group (team) setting.  They will never settle for second best. 


Pavel Datsyuk was born under the sign of Cancer, the crab.  They possess incredible perseverance and strong intuition, but are complex beings who are fragile and temperamental.  Conflict causes them great distress.
Henrik Zetterberg is a Libra, a sign that says he is graceful and happiest when other people (his team) are around.  Although they have excellent instincts, Libras dislike hard work.


Interestingly, Chris Osgood and Marc-Andre Fleury were both born under the sign of Sagittarius.  These are optimistic, positive types.  They perform very well and are at their best when it’s crunch time and when they are under pressure.  And they never dwell in the past (that last goal that eluded them). 

The two best defensemen on each team were born in April, but under two different signs.  Sergei Gonchar is an Aries, courageous, but short-tempered.  They are real go-getters with a drive to succeed and an aggressive nature! Niklas Lidstrom was born a Taurus, the bull.  They are persistent and stubborn, not fond of change.


Here is a little recap of each one’s horoscope for Game One on Saturday, May 24:


Leo (Crosby and Malkin) – Let others do their own thing.
Cancer (Datsyuk) – Money matters are at the top of your mind.
Libra (Zetterberg) – Lighten up and have fun.
Sagittarius (Osgood and Fleury) – Interacting with strangers can be a gamble.
Aries (Gonchar) – Be prepared for an unexpected opportunity.
Taurus (Lidstrom) – Give others some space, resist turning to them for help.
What can we take from all this? 

  • Maybe Crosby and Malkin will have multiple assists as they let “others do their own thing”. 
  • Maybe Datsyuk will be distracted by thoughts of paying his bills and not play well and Zetterberg will have a great game. 
  • Maybe neither goaltender will welcome “strangers” into their crease. 
  • Maybe Gonchar will have a breakaway, short-handed goal, an “unexpected opportunity”. 
  • Maybe Lidstrom will rely on others and let a Penguin or two get by him. 

Maybe this is all baloney, but it sure is fun!  We’ll see if any of these come to pass.  Note that there are no horoscope signs named after penguins or octopi!  So much for my purely unscientific take on Game One.  Blame it on being giddy with excitement.


Are we ready, Penguin Nation?  Then let’s doooo it!!

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