|Here We Go!
This is my first hockey column ever, for the prestigious Hockey & High Heels website (look, already I’m kissing up to the boss lady!).
It’s an honour for me to present my musings and mental meanderings to you, hockey lovers of all stripes - especially the women, who let’s face it, keep this league in business with our purchasing power, no?
As an aside, I‘d be curious to know which of you ladies LIKE or DISLIKE the new pink style McGirlie Jerseys that most of the teams are hawking this season. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org with your opinions and we’ll print the results.
First off, let me say that my loyalties lie with my home team, the Vancouver Canucks, as I was born and raised here and have been a fan (thru the good and bad years) for almost 30 years (no, I am not an old Grandma – I started early).
It’s been a challenging time for us ‘nuckers. Our team has been decimated by trades and free agent signings elsewhere this off-season, and you can’t tell the jersey names without an accompanying media guide. Who the ‘f’ is Fitzpatrick?
One thing that has stayed the same, thank God, is our Swedish Touch – that’s the twin Sedins, Markus Naslund (hey, 19!) and of course, stalwart Matthias Ohlund on the ‘D’. I pray for a good season for Markus. He has been through the wringer with crappy playoff appearances by our team, and having to carry the burden of the “Bertuzzi incident” for a couple of years, due to his loyalty to the big bear. My Nazzy Bobblehead (given to me by boss-lady) gets a good shake-ola after every Nazzy point.
Here is my take on our “boys of winter.”
1. When our very expensive ‘keeper Roberto Luongo lets in a soft goal, he doesn't crumple a la 'the sensitive Clouts,' our former dude Dan Cloutier, now with L.A. Luongo just digs in his skate blades and says to himself "screw you - you are NOT gettin' nothin' by me now suckers!!!"
2. After getting a signing “bonus” of like a million, due to Bobby Clarke’s bizarre gamesmanship, forward Ryan Kesler, third year journeyman for the Canucks, got slammed into the boards in his fourth game and couldn’t make it to the bench. Many who thought he didn’t deserve all that cash were hoping he’d fall on his face. Well, you got your wish. However, Kesler was back in action for the season home opener on Oct. 13th.
3. My Mom is a frickin' hockey prognosticator. She told me several years ago when he was “whatever,” that Bertuzzi would shine; now she's all over Salo – if his groin holds out there’s no stopping him! We've gotta figure out how to profit from old ma, eh boss-lady?
1. With his funny-isms a la Forrest Gump: “I like to eat chocolate”; the big devil-may-care grin; and the unbelievable highlight reel goals scored by Alexander Ovechkin of the Capitals – do you think former Russian sweetie Ilya Kovulchuk of the Thrashers is feeling a little left out? After all, with big names like Fedorov getting’ old, it was Ilya’s turn to shine! And what about Malkin in Pittsburgh – what a farce! However, now he’s playing, scoring goals, and has probably forgotten about his crazy journey to the Igloo.
2. They say women are catty – well, I’ve heard and seen just as many male hockey fans comment or write on forums about the Tie Domi-Belinda “affair,” as well as the supposed Chris Pronger “leaving town by dead of night” situation in Edmonton over the summer. Is hockey itself that drab that who’s doin’ who takes centre stage? Let’s hope not.
3. We are into now into week three, the cup-winning Hurricanes started the season with a Stanley Cup hangover and lost their first four games, the Wild are leading their division, and the Philadelphia Flyers are the first team to clean some house by turfing head coach, Ken Hitchcock, and saying good bye to Bob (don’t let the door hit you on the way out) Clarke. All is topsy-turvy in the “almost-new” NHL. You can throw last season out the window – welcome to 2006-07.
See ya next month, hockey fans! HP